You can spend a glorious day at the beach. Fun and sun, surf and sand, walking the boardwalk all add up to a splendid day. But, until you see the sun setting over the ocean, the pallet of golds. reds, blues and oranges, you can’t call it a perfect day at the beach.
Similar comparisons can be made about cocktails and barbequing. You can grill the perfect T-Bone, burger, chop or chicken breast, mix up a creamy, cool bowl of potato-salad, put on a favorite CD, but without a cold drink in your hand, washing away the day as you tend to the heat, its not a perfect barbeque.
Just as much emphasis should be put on what’s waiting in the glass as to what’s sizzling on the coals. I’m a lush… I love most anything cool and alcoholic…as long as it leaves me able to entertain. Sips or refreshing gulps can be made in between the turn of a steak or rack of ribs. A properly made drink will be enjoyed and praised as much as the smoked flavor of the ribs. The two should be considered naughty lovers, walking hand in hand towards your doctors “tsk…tsk…tsk†later in the year at you physical. The sound of ice tinkling in a glass is an absolutely essential noise of the evening; right up there with meat sizzling, a big neighbor-lady’s cackle and the sound of a dad screaming at his child for playing too close to the adults.
I’m a big believer in the enjoyment of a drink before your company arrives, while your preparing the grill and table, selecting the music, and marinating the meat. This pre-drink can set the tone for the evening. If the host is happy and enjoying himself at the early stage of a barbeque, then there’s nothing to worry about ‘till you have to clean up after everyone leaves. By then, the effects of the drink(s) have worn off and the cleaning of the grill will blow just as much as it would without ‘em. You may feel a little more ready for the sack, but just push through and sleep in the next morning knowing that they’ll be less flies and full trash sacks in the back-yard to deal with.
Final note on the event, most of my barbeques are held with neighbors; Neighbors who can walk home after a night of eating and drinking. If you’re serving booze, make sure the drivers can spend the night or cut them off after one, early in the evening. Make sure you have a selection of premium, bottled sodas on hand. If a drinker, who’s forbidden from drinking alchohol, spots some sort of iced, Vermont brewed root-beer with a rustic label and a cap you gotta take-off with a real bottle opener, they’ll feel special and won’t bitch so much about having to drink soda. . Have a couple of these hard to find sodas iced in some antique looking tub. Everyone will go “OOOhhhhhhhhhh†when they see it. Plus, the wives won’t get so mad when they’ve been told they’re driving homme and see you on your third boozy drink.
On to the drinks –
I know a lot of you out there will think this silly, but your wrong. A well- made Tiki drink, served in the proper mug or glass, kicks a cold beer at the grill’s ass in the Summer Time. Yuppers, it takes a little more work than cracking a beer and bending your arm, but the pay-off is ten-fold. Don’t get me wrong, I love an icy brew as much as the next guy but a barbeque is special and a special, golden, magic, unicorny drink should be served during one.
I’ve picked up most of my Tiki-Mugs at a site called tikifarm.com. Check it out and pick up one or two. They’re really cool, fun to hold and drink out of and some of them even come with secret drink recipes hidden deep inside. The Don Ho is a wonderful mug to start with. The Brady Bunch, Hawaii episode will come to mind when drinking out of the Don Ho and “presto†,an instant conversation starter with the lady to your left at the barbeque… “I thought Greg was gonna die…I really did. He sure is a good surferâ€Â You can also find beautiful tiki glasses or mugs on ebay or antique stores. You may even catch the bug and start collecting. The drink will taste so much better sipped from a tiki mug then slorped from a plastic glass. If you’re having less than six for dinner, authentic tiki mugs are the way to go. More than six? Pick up some plastic tiki style mugs from a party store. Don’t break the bank your first time out the gate.
What’s a tiki drink without the little umbrella and fruit garnish? Make these ahead of time and stash them in the fridge in a folded, wet paper-towel. No one will notice if the orange slice isn’t fresh-cut. You’ll also finally have something to do with those blue maraschino cherries you’ve seen at the market. Folks will love it.
Make sure you have plenty of ice. Better to dump ice the next morning then run out at the barbeque. This rule stands for all future drinking.
I’ll start you off with two and a half recipes. This should carry you through your barbeque along with the wine and cold beer I know your gonna buy, anyway. You don’t want to keep making drinks, so make them by the picher and just keep them cold in the fridge.
1) HORNY MONKEY – My wife loves this one (hey…..wait a minute). It involves just three liquor ingredients so you’re getting off light in the world of tiki.
Here we go. For each drink you’ll need
1 ½ oz. Banana liqueur
1 oz vodka
½ oz whie rum
2 ox cream of coconut
sm. Can Dole pinapple juice
Fill a shaker with ice, add all ingredients and shake ‘till ice-cold. Garnish with thick banana slice and dust with cinnamon. Serve with straw.
2) BIG BAMBOO LOVE SONG – This one’s just fun to say. Say it as many times as you can during the evening. What the hell, you’ll never get to say it again.
Here we go. For each drinker, you’ll need
2 oz dark rum
1 oz white rum
½ oz triple sec
1 oz orange juice
2 oz pineapple juice
1 oz lime juice
¾ oz fruit syrup (I use my kid’s fruit punch and it tastes great).
Fill a shaker with a ton of ice. Shake it ‘till you can’t hold it any longer or your fingers will freeze off. Garnish with a slice of orange and a cherry. Serve with straw.
½ ) THE ONE THATâ€S EASY TO MAKE WHEN YOU’VE HAD 5 OF THE OTHERS AND PEOPLE STILL WANT TO DRINK
Pick up a bottle of the delicious Trader Vic’s Mai Tai Mix. You can find it in grocery stores or on the Trader Vic’s web page. The recipe on the bottle is fantastic by itself or do what I do on occasion, pick up a bottle of coconut rum and add a sm. can of pineapple juice, 3 oz T. Vics Mai Tai mix and 3 ox of the rum to a shaker full of ice. Squeeze in the juice of one lime and shake ‘till its freezing cold. Garnish with a cherry and a little umbrella. This one’s easy to make when you’ve had five of the others.
Final thought……we’re sliding into Summer now, the days are long and hot and grilling 3 feet away from red-hot coals calls for a little more than a cold one. You can make a wonderful, quenching, and downright fun drink with just a few minutes prep time. Hey, you prep your grill for the meat your going to cook on it. Spend just a few minutes prep and pour yourself a tiki drink this season. The beer will still be there when your done.
